Posts from — February 2008

Second in a Series 

Mississippi House Bill 282:

An act to prohibit certain food establishments from serving food to any person who is obese, based on criteria prescribed by the state department of health; to direct the department to prepare written materials that describe and explain the criteria for determining whether a person is obese and to provide those materials to the food establishments; to direct the department to monitor the food establishments for compliance with the provisions of this act; and for related purposes

Or 

The “No You Can’t Have Fries with That” Bill

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to your favorite fast food restaurant!  After all, the killer trans-fats have been rounded up and converted to bio-diesel.  America’s arteries are getting flushed-out from their 40 year Crisco fix .

But look, up on the Mississippi Capitol Dome!

Is it a bird?

Is it a plane?

No, it’s the Mississippi Nanny Brigade!  Representatives W.T. MayHall, Jr., Bobby Shows and John Read.  Under the proposed law, a restaurateur could have his business permit revoked for serving fat folks.

I can just see it now… “Sorry, Bobby but I’m gonna have ta shut ya down. Ya gave a cheeseburger to ol’ Ben here and he’s 1.5 pounds over the obese limit”.

Let’s make the overweight even more self-conscious!  (Yeah, like they don’t know they’re fat.)  Let’s put a scale in the waiting area of each restaurant (certified by the State’s Weights and Measures Bureau of course – annual re-inspection fee $150.00) that calls out whether a particular patron can remain.

When the scale cries out, “OH MY GOD! Get off, you’re crushing me!” you probably can’t stay.

Gee, while you’re at it, why don’t the fine gentlemen from the Mississippi House enact a law restricting what folks can buy in the supermarket.  You could have a scale at the entrance and an RFID tag on the shopping cart that would pair up the customer and the cart. Every time the shopper put something in the cart, a bar code scanner would read the item, compare it to the State established dietary guidelines for the weight of the customer and report back whether the customer could keep his bag of Double Stuff Orieos.   (This of course would open up a whole black market for “substitute shoppers”. You know, the skinny kid down the block. Pay her $10 to get you 4 half-gallons of Bryers Ice Cream.)

GET A GRIP!

STOP TRYING TO LIVE OUR LIVES FOR US!

NOBODY ASKED YOU IF EATING PIZZA IS A GOOD IDEA.

If I die early, I did my patriotic duty to save social security!   (Where’s the Meat Lover’s Pizza?)

“No tyranny is so irksome as petty tyranny: the officious demands of policemen, government clerks, and  electromechanical gadgets.  — Edward Abbey    — and the Berkeley City Council

A story reported on 1 Feb 2008 in the San Francisco Chronicle, relates an on-going protest at a Marine Corps recuiting station located in Berkley California.  It seems Berkley, that bastion of academic freedom, has decided that the Marines are  “uninvited and unwelcome intruders”.  

In what can only be assumed was a move to provoke some reaction from the Marines, the City Council voted late Tuesday to give Code Pink (an anti-war protest group) a designated parking space directly in front of the recruiting station, as well as a sound permit for once-a-week protests.

“We were shocked when we learned last fall that this recruiting station showed up here,” Zanne Joy said. “It’s an affront to the city and the people of Berkeley, who have always supported peace.”

Note to Zanne Joy and Like Minded Individuals:

The Marines you have decided are “uninvited and unwelcome intruders” are the same Marines that bled and died to give you the rights you enjoy.  

(BTW are you the same Zanne Joy listed as individual tax protester #184 at http://sniggle.net/Experiment/index.php?entry=outline if so,  please explain how you justify making the rest of the citizens of the United States pay for your “acts of conscience”?  If you cannot in principle fund the war in Iraq, why not send in that portion of your taxes which covers health care, education, environmental cleanup, energy research etc? I’m sure you can figure out what percentage of your tax bill supports the  war and remit the balance.   While you’re at it, you might forward your war protest taxes to any organization that cares for wounded vets, victims of landmines or any one of a number of worthwhile causes.

Or are you in this simply to hide your tax evasion behind a noble cause?  Just a few thoughts to ponder.

Note to the Berkley City Council:

When the next earthquake strikes or forest fires consume the hillsides or torrential rains sweep whole communities into the sea, will our military then be “uninvited and unwelcome intruders”?  Probably not, you sanctamonious hypocrites.